Brad and Kendall's wedding was such a fun way to start the 2012 season. To say they were the most laid back couple is an understatement. They completely enjoyed their day without all of the fuss and stress most bride and groom's suffer from!

Winter weddings are always a challenge since Maryland weather is so unpredictable in January. However, we had a beautiful day and were able to shoot their First Look outside on the grounds of The Antrim 1844.

Kendall's dress was designed by her costumer designer aunt, whose Tony award winning designs have appeared on Broadway. The delicate jacket was a nod to Kendall's mom's mandarin collared gown and even had "Z" embroidered on either side referencing the family name Zoa that has graced the women for many generations. And who could miss the gold Jimmy Choo's? Good thing Brad was still taller than Kendall with these on!

I have to say that I LOVE when a bride and groom choose to see each other before the ceremony. In this instance, my heart jumped for joy when Brad turned around and literally sprang forward in a run towards his bride. It is such a beautiful moment to be a part of.

After a traditional Catholic ceremony, the guests returned to Antrim for the treat of the century - the bluegrass band The Hackensaw Boys were playing in the mansion. The mood that they set during cocktails contunied throughout the night - carefree, exuberant partying! I cannot describe to you how the floor was bouncing so much that I literally had to stabilize myself for some shots when in the middle of the crazy dancing mass of friends! And speaking of friends - Brad and Kendal have a TON. Kendall included guys on her side of the bridal party which I love! It was such a family event even down to the decor!

Vendors:

Ceremony: St. Joseph's in Taneytown

Reception: The Antrim 1844

Dress designed by Judith Dolan

Bouquets and Boutonnieres: The Flower Box

Room Design and Decor: Steve Szymanski (email typed this way for spam: stephenszymanski (at) stephenszymanski (dot) com)

Band: The Hackensaw Boys

Cupcakes: Starry Night Bakery

Portrait studio + too much time away from family = time to close studio!

That is the short of it, the long of it is below. If you just want to know what now, skip down to that bolded heading. If you want to know how I got to this decision, read on.

I have been in business for myself for 11 years. It seems hard to believe.. but 10 of those have been dedicated solely to photography. Mostly weddings, but lots of portraiture in the past 5 years, and with 2 different studio locations. I only moved into my Roop's Mill studio last summer. But I will be closing the portrait side of my business as of September 1. I will continue with weddings as usual.

This is a heartbreaking decision for me, yet I feel completely at peace about it. When I survey the last 3 years of my life, I am not happy with it, and yet - it seems I have hit this great place in my career. I have worked hard to be "known" in my area for portraits. I have finally gotten studio space with property to shoot on. I have great business connections. I am busy. And yet, I have been giving my family my leftovers and am super burned out. I have spent waaaay too many all nighters editing, stressed myself out over clients enough to snap at my kids constantly, and have been so uninvolved in my husband's ministry I can only name a few of the kids in his youth ministry. That to me is a shame. If I hear one more person say, "I know you must be really busy." I think I will scream! I HATE the busyness of my business. I will not have to stand before God to give account for my business. I have to stand before him to give account for my marriage and my parenting. That weight hit me like a ton of bricks late this spring.

I was a photographer before I had kids. I had a thriving business before kids... so it never occurred to me to set it aside when I had kids. I was my own boss, I could manage the amount of work I wanted to take on. But, as many of my close friends can tell you, I am a creative type - not an organized type and definitely not a business type. I am terrible at business to be honest. But, I do have drive, and I wanted to have a portrait business as well as wedding business. I loved shooting seniors, babies, families, food even! And so I pursued all of it.

But when I was with my kids, I was distracted by work stresses. When I was at work, I was distracted by mommy-guilt. Any working mom knows this divided feeling. It is awful. So awful that the past 3 years have been miserable in that sense. Sure, the business was growing, but inwardly I was shriveling up.

I knew I wanted more time with my boys and Pete. But I couldn't stop what I had started. I even had various people working for me at different points along the way. I knew I wanted more time with my boys and Pete, but I couldn't stop what I had started... could I? With everyone and their mother starting photography businesses lately, who closes one??

So here is the transparent, vulnerable part; the ugly part that comes to the surface when God is working a painful but GOOD refining process in you. I am a control freak and fear has driven me for the past 6 months. I kept thinking, if I quit portraiture now, I will never be able to get back into it. I have worked so hard to create a space for my style of portraiture in my area and now newbies will ride on my coattails and take all my business. I felt that I had paid my dues and wanted to stay in the game to get what I felt I was owed. But the more I stayed in the game operating with this wrong spirit, the less satisfied I was. The more control I wanted to exert over my life, the more out of control I began to feel. I realized I had begun to tie up my identity in my career. Big problem.

My identity does not come from a brand, a logo, or a name in my very fickle photography industry. My worth is not based on who likes or doesn't like my images, how much a client invests with me in time or money or in the accolades of peers. My identity is in Christ alone. For some of you, this may sound strange. It may seem like the craziest time to close my portrait business and what the heck does this have to do with Jesus?

In the world's eyes closing the portrait side of the business may seem like a failure. I may seem like I am walking away from future successes. But what I am choosing instead is worth far more than any money, accolade, fame or even self satisfaction that my career can bring, and that is to raise my boys to be men of God, who live lives of integrity and honor God in all they do. I need to choose to stay close to Pete and pour more into our marriage than I do in building a business. My identity needs to come first from being a follower of Christ, then a wife to Pete and then a mother to Caden and Ryder. How does my identity come from those things? Ask yourself, what is the first thing you think about when you wake up and go to bed? What do you spend all your time on? What does your checkbook reveal is your priority? For me, I want my photography business to not be the answer to any of those questions and right now it is. So I am putting it to rest.

This all just came into focus for me recently. At first, I thought I was making a big sacrifice of my own personal desires in exhange for quality time with my family. But I realized I had already been sacrificing my family to an idol. The idol was "success" as a photographer. And as silly as it is to watch a live human with a soul bow down and offer gifts to a lifeless manmade idol, that is exactly what I was doing. By scaling back and cutting out the portraiture and the studio, I hope to focus more on my family. I want to be emotionally and spiritually more in tune with a husband who has the crazy emotionally/spiritually draining vocation of pastor. I want to put my kids to bed and go to bed myself, not go to work!

I can see now that my security was coming from how well my business was doing or how well clients liked me or whatever. God has been pulling on my heart over the past few years to return to a homeward focus and I have ignored Him. He has been giving me hints and signs at what He wanted for me and I was stubborn and selfish and did not see or chose not to see them. This caused me a lot of pain and anguish this past year. Some of you have said to me, "I don't know how you do it all." and I jokingly reply, "I don't claim to do it well!" And while I shrugged those comments off with a joke, the piercing truth was there. I have not been doing it all well. I thank God for Pete and a few close godly girlfriends for being a sounding board and speaking truth to me when I sought them out for counsel. It is rare to have friends like this and I am grateful to you. (Want real friends like this? Stop faking it and get real: brutally honestly transparently real).

I covet your prayers. I am at peace with my decision, but it seems at every bend that there is someone or something posing a temptation to veer off course. An influx of portrait requests, opportunities becoming available, etc. But I am more excited about some room to breathe in my life, focus on my quickly growing boys and the ability to provide better customer service to my wedding clients. I am excited to refocus my energy on weddings solely and some teaching here and there of my photography classes. I want to get back into ministry. I want redefine my identity to be 100% found in Christ alone.

So what does this mean?

If you are a current portrait client (meaning you have a scheduled session and contract with me) I will be honoring the schedule and contractual agreements. I am no longer taking on new sessions. My September is very booked with weddings and I will be in Mozambique with Pete for part of October. If you have been given a gift certificate or have one from an I Shoot My Kids class, please contact me immediately to make plans. If you have had a session with me and want to purchase the disc of images, please contact me for pricing. And look back soon as I may be posting some items for sale from the studio/portrait side of my business :)

Thanks for taking the time to read this.

kim (at) kimberlybrooke (dot) com

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I want to take my kids back. I know some would say that is too dangerous. But what would happen if they had a global perspective early on? How could we change the social injustice of the world? It took me 30 years to get to this point, we could begin to really live out what we believe in if we can teach our own kids and expose them to it... let them be changed early on...? Now that would be dangerous.

What is equally dangerous is being confronted with a big old mirror - that kind that makes you look fat and unattractive and yet is the real mirror. And I'm trying to face some of what I see in me... like thoughts on success and poverty and sacrifice and selfishness.

How do we measure success on a short trip like this? Is it the number of children fed? The amount of houses rebuilt? The level of health care given? Do we set out our attainable goals and meet them to count the financial sacrifice a trip like this takes all worth it? How do we measure that?

What does poor mean??? God's economy is not ours. Ours is upside down. They may be poor in finances, but they are rich in His kingdom. We are in the top 1% of the world's wealthiest people, if you make more than $10,000 a year.

The need for water is so crucial that they would walk miles for it, travel all over do anything for it... Jesus is the living water for our souls and we have access to him and straight ignore him.

We have the word of God in our houses, our churches, our computers and phones, they may have one or 2 copies in a community and yet their thirst is deeper.

Worms infect about 800 million school age children worldwide-simply by drinking or stepping into contaminated water or eating food prepared by someone who didn't wash their hands first. Infected children become malnourished and grow sicker and weaker with each passing week. They become physically and intellectually stunted, and many die. Those parasites steal their nourishment, but what parasites are stealing ours? I realized I have a lot of parasites in my life. TV, internet, selfish ambitions, the pursuit of happiness. When I was in Haiti and was an unplugged technophile, I felt more myself and more peaceful than I had in a long time. I felt more in tune with God than I had in a long time. I had more time to read my Word, more time to spend in true community with the little group that went. More focus.

It is easy to say that I had a spiritual mountaintop experience in those mountains. It is easy to look at a trip like this and think, "Well, of course you were connected with god. You saw amazing things. You didn't have the responsibilities we have here at home." You know what? I put those things on myself here at home. Kids in poverty don't know any better how to protect themselves from parasites that will destroy them, and yet I know full well what is eating away at my spiritual body. Living in full recognition of who Jesus is and what he has done for me and yet I choose to return to the dirty water wells over and over and over. I know Pete is going to return from Africa on Wednesday with images of children who are malnourished and stunted in growth... and yet that is what I am! The mirror of Haiti showed me that under my fat, healthy American body is a soul that is in need of nourishment. A life lived in comfort is stunting my growth. The complexity and technology of my advanced culture is destroying the simplicity of the life he calls me to lead.

Let me share with you a little obscure verse from Prov 30.

"Two things I ask of you, O LORD;

do not refuse me before I die:

Keep falsehood and lies far from me;

give me neither poverty nor riches,

but give me only my daily bread.

Otherwise, I may have too much and disown you

and say, 'Who is the LORD ?'

Or I may become poor and steal,

and so dishonor the name of my God.

This guy Agur who wrote this is cautious of 2 extremes. He wants to keep lies away from him and live in truth. He asks God not to give him too much riches so he is not tempted to think he doesn't need God (Hello, America?) and yet he also asks God not to give him poverty so he doesn't get tempted to steal and dishonor the name of God. What he asks for is only his daily bread. Just enough to live day to day. Just enough to know it is from God and praise Him for it. Sounds like Jesus knew this Proverb when he prayed what we now call the Lord's prayer... give us this day our daily bread. Are we living daily? Are we eating the bread of His Word daily?

Have we bought the lie close to us that the pursuit of happiness will give us life?

If know you are drinking from broken cisterns, returning over and over again to the water that kills you, allowing parasites in your life to eat away at your spiritually would come face to face with the mirror. I want to pray that God would come change us. That HE would be our source. That we would find our riches in HIM alone.

Matthew 16:24 - And Jesus Said to his disciples, if any one would come after me, he must deny himself, pick up his cross and follow after me.

I ended that night of speaking with one of my favorite Willet songs "Carry the Cross" based off of the Thomas andagrave; Kempis quote

"Jesus now has many lovers of His heavenly kingdom, but few bearers of His cross."

Here are the lyrics:

I WANT TO BE A BEARER OF YOUR CROSS

NOT JUST A LOVER OF YOUR KINGDOM, NOT JUST A LOVER OF YOUR KINGDOM

I WANT TO BE A BEARER OF YOUR CROSS

NOT JUST A LOVER OF YOUR KINGDOM, NOT JUST A LOVER OF YOUR KINGDOM

JESUS, YOU BORE THE PAIN FOR ME

JESUS, YOU TOOK THE NAILS IN YOUR HANDS AND YOUR FEET

SO I WILL / CARRY THE CROSS

SO I WILL / CARRY THE CROSS

AND EVEN THOUGH THE STORMS MAY COME

AND I'LL STUMBLE DOWN THIS ROAD I'M ON

I'LL CARRY THE CROSS / BECAUSE YOU CARRIED ME THROUGH IT ALL

Listen to the song here (track 8)

NEXT POST: IMAGES!!!!!

There are two primary schools in Kafou Tenten, each with about 350 students. These schools are not government operated and the families pay a tuition of 600 gourdes ($15) a year to send their children to school. This tuition covers the teachers' salaries. Uniforms and schools supplies are not included in this amount and must be bought by the families. The cost of schooling hinders many families from sending their children to school. [ALL of the kids WANT to go to school.] Only 2% of children in this community finish secondary school [which isn't even in their community]. The religious beliefs in this community are a mixture of Christian and voodoo practices [didn't see any sign of voodoo].

There are two sources of water nearby that each take about an hour to walk to. [down an insanely steep ravine trail that is slippery and rocky and left me winded after just .25 mile! More on this water walk below...] Each of these sources of water serve a minimum of 1000 people on a daily basis.

andbull; Child protection due to family disintegration.

andbull; Fear keeping even those children who were attending school from going back.

andbull; Lack of adequate latrines. [this is so true. I don't think anyone there has a true latrine... just imagine that daily.]

andbull; Need for post-disaster spiritual and psychological counseling

andbull; Neighborhood clean-up and relief planning.

Ongoing critical issues:

andbull; Most of the children in the community do not attend school because their parents cannot afford the tuition fees.

andbull; Health care is another critical issues. There is a health clinic building in Kafou Tenten but it is currently not staffed other than the occasional mobile clinic that comes once every few months.

andbull; The nearest hospital is in Fermathe, 10 km away.

andbull; Common illnesses among the children include diarrhea, headache, eye problems (pink eye), anemia, malnutrition, malaria and skin eruptions [saw a ton of runny noses and skin issues].

andbull; Economic hardship, lack of adequate water and sanitation are also critical issues.

Strategies for meeting these needs:

andbull; Child-focused initiatives that sponsorship supports will complement a US government grant and other relief funds targeting immediate quake-related structural, nutritional and protection issues. This government grant is short-term.

andbull; Sponsorship funding will allow FH to stay in the community for the seven to ten years that will be required to reach the long-term vision for a community that meets its children's needs.

andbull; Sponsorship will allow staff to develop relationships with children, parents and community/church leaders that can carry on after relief clean-up and rebuilding ends.

View Kafou Tenten, Haiti in a larger map through google... in 3D. I put markers in a few places for you (including the water walk).

I am sure that you could take this text above and pretty much replace a few small stats and it would be a picture of poverty stricken areas all over our world... even in our own backyard in the deepest parts of Appalachia. What amazes me to this day is that in such a media driven culture that I could know these things mentally, have a decent grasp on them visually and even a few anecdotal connections through friends' stories, but nothing makes something as real to you until you experience it yourself.

One of the best things we did while in Kafou Tenten was to take a water walk. I geared up by putting on my Swiss Army Trail shoes, grabbed my camera and bag with an extra lens and walked with the rest of our crew with buckets in tow. We walked about a mile down a muddied road to a point where we took a small path through some woods and came to a clearing where the main downward path to the water started. I was excited to do this to "experience" what these kids do 2-3 times a day. But I began to get a little anxious when I saw the terrain. This was a freaking cliff side with a winding little path. 3 boys who looked 5-8 bounded by us barefoot with their jugs and buckets and bounced down the path like little pinballs. Every muscle in my legs was tense as I tried to navigate down the path. There were points where I slipped, points where I had to reach out to grab an exposed root or rock to steady myself and we hadn't even gotten halfway there! Karena and Kat stopped at a point because she is pregnant and it was just ridiculous t even think about her descending, so AshLee, Justin, Jeremy, Jordan and I went down to the water source.

We reached the bottom and my heart sank. I had seen the video footage from the first team's trek last month (posted below), but like I said... you have to BE there to get it. There were a few kids hanging out on a rock that had been smoothed by years of water flow. They were washing off their faces and feet. A few were beginning to scoop water with a small metal bowl into their old Mazola oil jugs. As you can imagine, this is not the most efficient method. We hung out with the kids for a while, helping fill water jugs and buckets, and discovering a large crab!!!! I had no idea crabs could even exist in fresh water mountain springs. His pincher was as big as my thumb. But really our hanging out with the kids was to catch our breath and mentally prepare for the climb back up. We had spilled our water a few times and refilled... so we were finally ready. I took a short clip from my iPhone that I will post. I had my asthma inhaler ready and headed up - NOT EVEN CARRYING A BUCKET, MIND YOU. I was a mess. Seriously stumbling and breathing hard. Again, getting passed by kids who seemed to be leaping uphill with water jugs on their heads. They laughed at our clumsiness and seemed to get a kick out of our attempt. At one point, an 11 year old girl took my bag off my back and out it on then reached out her arm to steady me. She was helping ME up the mountain!!!

Exactly.

I have learned more about my own selfishness through the process of parenting then I ever imagined. Daily I am faced with the responsibilities of caring for a 3 and 5 year old - with a partner to make it easier! Yet I still complain, grumble, get mad (fiery mad if you know me) and can be brought to tears by the foolishness of my children. Through these short 5 years, I have learned more about the insane unyielding, unfathomable, unconditional love of my Father than I could have ever known alone.

Sometimes in America we live at status quo - marriage, house, kids, the pursuit of happiness. Since when was it all about us?? The moment I had Caden, I couldn't imagine NOT loving him. The first moment he disobeyed me and I saw the vile nature of the human heart even in a little person, I realized that I could be upset over the wrong done, yet not lose an ounce of love for him. For the first time, I truly had a sense of how God could love me in spite of myself! And then to love another child! To realize that you don't divide your heart to split the love you have between your kids, but that your heart grows exponentially to encompass them was again a soul awakening spiritual truth for me about hod God could possibly love the millions of us here on Earth, those that have come before and those yet to be born, enough to DIE for us. It just brings me to awe.

So, decidedly I would say that I now love children and *gasp* actually even help out in Sunday School with the Kindergarten age (mostly rambunctious boys). But in reality, I knew American children. I wondered what the kids of Haiti would be like.

The children of Kafou TenTen are just like ours, but equally not at all like ours. Ours may have daily or every other day baths, they may bathe once a week. Ours have toilets and potty training rituals, rewards for peeing in the potty and they go wherever. Oftentimes the littles ones wet themselves and their skin on their legs show the urine scalding or sores. Ours must brush twice a day, get fluoride treatments and even braces for aesthetically pleasing smiles... their smiles are riddled with gum disease, sometimes missing teeth, but smiles none the less. Ours may balk at taking their yummy gummy vitamins, but they live in vitamin deficient bodies whose yellowed eyes and nails show the evidence of malnutrition. Our children pour heaping mounds of sugary cereal over safely pasteurized cold milk, take or buy a well rounded lunch at school and enjoy warm dinners in the evenings while their children may eat one fruit that they pick themselves or a bowl of rice and beans a day. Our kids whine when we make them drink water instead of juice, while they walk 2 miles three times a day to get water for their families; water that isn't even safe to drink (more on that in a future blog post).

The children of Kafou TenTen live in beautiful mountains, play and work outdoors all day long and live in community with their siblings and cousins. I am going to stick with this post just being about the kids I met. I have lots of other things to talk about and I cannot generalize all children from all of Haiti or even all over the world. I know my kids, my community kids and got to know those in a little community whose name means Intersection of Junk or Nonsense. What amazed me is apart from some of the stark contrasts I saw so apparent on the exterior, on the inside these kids were the same as mine. In the Old Testament the Lord wanted to show Samuel who he should anoint as the new King and it says this in 1 Samuel 16:7

7 But the LORD said to Samuel, "Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The LORD does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart."

And it of course is an easy thing to say and acknowledge in your head that we are more than skin deep, that the inside counts, yada yada. But to see the hearts of these kids impressed on me even more the absolute sanctity of life in us His Image Bearers. I don't get hung up on what God looks like - He is a spirit (John 4:24), eternal and unchanging, but we have been created in His likeness. In Genesis 1:27 it says,

"And God created man in his own image, in the image of god He created him, male and female He created them."

So what am I getting at? The aspects of these children that were reflections of their Maker. They took joy in simple things. They laughed often. They lived in true community with eachother. They shared and gave generously. I remember passing out some snacks and watching siblings make sure their younger siblings got a piece of the snack or made sure they got their own. My fat 31-year old American body huffed and puffed my way back up that ravine from the water source with an 11 year old taking my bag from me and holding my arm, literally pushing me up the mountain. Constantly offering to help. I didn't see major displays of selfishness other than the occasional scuffle over who was first in line for jump rope.

Remember what I feared about kids - needing direction, discipline and attention? What I saw in the beautiful little faces of Kafou TenTen was need. Need for basic nutrition and sanitation. But more deeply a need for direction. The older girls talked of desperately wanting to attend secondary school so they could go to university and become nurses. We asked all of the kids what they wanted to be when they grew up. Most of the girls wanted to be nurses, a few of the boys wanted to be doctors and a few mechanics. One wanted to be a Pastor. They have dreams just like any child would. How could I have ever expected differently? Why was I so surprised to hear their lofty career aspirations? Why did I just type lofty? I think mostly I am being confronted with a big old mirror - that kind that makes you look fat and unattractive and yet is the real mirror. And I'm trying to face some of what I see in me...

...knowing that you were not redeemed with corruptible things, likesilver or gold, from your aimless conduct received by tradition from your fathers, 19 but with the precious blood of Christ, as of a lamb without blemish and without spot.

1 Peter 1:18-19

... All glory to him who loves us and has freed us from our sins by shedding his blood for us.
Revelation 1:5

When it came time to pack for this trip, I had a small debate with myself... do I take my state of the art top of the line Nikon D3 and carry gear amounting to over $10,000 on my person? Or do I pack light to shoot from the hip and not have extra weight. WHAT? This was the wrong debate. Instantly, I felt a pang of selfishness. Was I taking advantage of this opportunity to travel to Haiti to make compelling photojournalistic human interest images? Did you know there even exists a category for Picture of the Year International called Natural Disaster Picture Story? There are competitions whose winners have captured someone else's pain and suffering for the sake of art. Some of you may argue that without images like this, we would not know of the suffering that exists around the world. And that is exactly where I stood - between "social change driven by photography" and emotional manipulation. I mean, isn't that what we are as photographers? Manipulators? Telling a story visually from our perspective to illicit a response?

Many of you have said you can't wait to see my photos. Some have asked if I took photos of destruction. Some knew I was going to be around children. I just could not bring myself to photograph the misfortune of another. Riding with our windows up in a fairly decent FH vehicle through the rubble strewn roads (if that is what you can call them) while vendors lined every square inch trying to sell anything they could brought me to a paralysis. I didn't lift my camera to the window. I locked eyes with a few women squatting with their produce and tried to imagine how many other white people had passed by the same way... safe in their ride, going someplace other than where she was; staring at her through ground glass that costs more than what it would take to rebuild a home for her and her family.

This quote knocked me off my soapbox:

"In times when (some) photographers hold celebrity status, it is useful to be reminded that a good photograph does not solely depend on the photographer's ability to choose the right subject, location and light, but also on the chemistry and the collaboration, between photographer and subject...Despite my deep sympathy for socially inclined photographers, when the people portrayed feel ashamed of their portraits, there clearly is something wrong with this kind of photography." - Hans Durrer

(http://www.icce.rug.nl/~soundscapes/EDITORIAL/oped1105.shtml - I read this essay by Hans Durrer after I wrote this blog post and added the quote here. But if you want to really go deeper into this discussion it is a must read)

I'm not knocking photographers whose passion is to share the poverty and suffering and mistreatment of people throughout the world. There is a place for that, I just wasn't for me on this trip. I want to connect with people and co-author their story through images, not as a voyeur. I have been wrestling with the moral implications of this type of photography. I even had a conversation with Jeremy Willet about release statements in America that protect individuals from being profited from and the lack of such protection for third world countries. I acknowledge I have much to learn about this area and I would enjoy conversation about it. I have been reading about some influential photographers involved in social change and have found some I really respect and some that just turn me off. But I don't want to get hung up in lengthy ethical discussions for the sake of interesting dinner party talk. That is a waste of time and ultimately as much an insult to the human dignity as stealing images of people along the way.

That being said... I can't wait to share with you the images I DID make while there. I will post them separately to my blog, but please know that each pair of eyes you will see belonged to an incredible image of God standing before me. Some were shy, some were silly, some were more than willing to play for my camera - but all were fashioned in their mother's womb by the Creator and loved by him and us. Now I am challenged to be praying for each one. I have tried to remember all the names and stories, so if one image stands out to you and want to know more about them, please ask me! It will help me remember that the soul in the image is more than the photograph.

I welcome your comments on this blog!!!

7 years ago: first Compassion International child Charles Okongo from Kenya

1 year ago: Pete impacted deeply by Jeremy Willet and Justin Hanneken's book: carried. Food for the Hungrysponsor child Carlitos from Mozambique enters our life and Pete plans for fall 2010 Mozambique trip

9 months ago: Earthquake. My obsession with twitter streams about emergency relief. Gathered supplies to send on a ship from Miami to Les Cayes for an orphanage in Ti Riviere where Kat Willet was living and working

6 months ago: became more involved with Willet - both in helping the band book shows and supporting Willet Missions, Food for the Hungry sponsor child Menaud from Haiti enters our life

2 months ago: opportunity arises for me to travel to Haiti. I jump on it without thinking!

Last week: flew to Haiti with no expectations but to be changed....

The walls in Haiti have come down, but I realized there were many walls in my heart that needed to come down...the words are flowing now and I think this may turn into a few blog posts... so stay tuned.